I was trying to change it's shape. Because it's usually a mix of squared and rounded.
One of the few habits I'm able to retain and do every week is to give myself a manicure and pedicure.
I do it myself. I know it's a bit costly to spend something that may not last for 2 weeks. So I have my own set...
Not clumsy enough to mess it up, usually...
Only painted with natural colored nail polish.
Then one day I looked at my nails for a moment. My toes especially -- I observed that the shapes are not as consistent.
That my nails are actually very short.
That I still retain the lengths relatively from my childhood.
I used to bite my nails as a child, but I forgot how I dropped the habit. Maybe it was replaced.
I also used to impulsively pick off nail polish. Then suddenly I don't after years of never wearing any nail polish.
I used to not make it any more elaborate until I find how to make nail polish stay a bit long... Or at least less prone to breaking off. Now I apply at least 2 thin layers.
I used to just... Cut my nails every week or so. And it's usually too short.
Reminds me of those 'it's late for me to realize this stupid habit but better late but never thing' -- like how I kept cleaning plates of servings past comfort but that's another story for another day...
Then, realizing how short it is -- that it made cutting and cleaning difficult.
That some shapes would make my finger nails prone to ingrown nails.
I wouldn't want that.
I want to make it consistent so I did.
Let the nails grew a bit until I can shape it up.
And I sort of did. At least with my hands first -- my feet would come later.
Instead of 'roundish', I made it a bit 'squarish'.
And it looked a bit awkward. Because of the visible thing where you can see dusts or whatever underneath those nails.
I may need a neutral, skin tone matched nail polish color instead of natural transparent ones soon.
It's not like I'm obsessed with nail polish.
My mom used to -- sort of. And it used to be her mini livelihood.
... Also remembered that apparently, I'm the only one who can apply nail polish to my former boss without tickling her.
... Also those painful procedures that involves picking off flesh and potentially let it bleed... Well, I'm NOT at that level. Again, I'm not a professional.
... Also that I recall that I only ever paid for manicure and pedicure once.
How silly to mention that -- though, still, if I'm going to spend like 2USD equivalent every other week, that would be going to the gym. Whatever gym related topic I have in mind now is another topic for another day...
Also I've yet to try making a habit on filing my nails.
Also I've yet to accustom with my fingernail shape whenever I scratch my head or just scratch overall.
I don't want mine long.
And I don't want the less convenient nail shape.
But it is still feels awkward. Underneath the nails was this roundish shape internal skin thing -- while the nails itself are squarish. It just feels weird.
The less closer to cut over the skin might be vulnerable to bending and I don't like it.
And I scratch a lot. My head especially. My fingers feels so... "Uneven".
Hope I will someday just get used to it.
Know my own fingers. It's limits and all that feeling.
Work in progress.